Farm Subsidies and How the Problem was Handled by the First Secretary of Agriculture
My story today is, I think, rather unusual.
First of all, I want to use the Bible as my text.
Now, that's a very difficult thing to do these days because whenever you mention the Bible, you usually run into two types of people.
Either those who are angry if you don't use it, or those who are angry if you do.
Now, I want to use it, and I don't want anybody to be angry, so I want you to understand
that I'm making use of the Bible not because I'm an advocate or an opponent, I'm making
use of it because it has a very good story in it that tells a very interesting lesson,
and it's something that we might profit by whether you like the Bible or believe in it
or not, the story is a crackerjack, and it ought to be known.
So this goes back to the time, and you'll find this story, incidentally, in Genesis,
and all I'm going to do is tell the story in, let me say, more or less, praxeological
terms.
Okay?
Anyway, this goes back to the time when Joseph was born and grew up to be a young lad of
17.
May Recall, Joseph, he had two parents. Now, that's not altogether unique, but the interesting
thing about Joseph was that he was the child of the old age of his parents, and thus he
turned out to be the youngest child. Usually the last one born is the youngest. And this
was true of Joseph, and he grew up with having a number of brothers who were older than he
," you see, that follows when you're youngest. Now, Joseph, we begin to discover a little
bit about his character at an early age. He seemed to have a considerable amount of self-esteem.
The first record we have of him indicates this little experience. Apparently he had
a dream, and he confronted his brothers and he said, fellas, I've had a dream last night,
and I want to tell you what it was. In my dream, all of you were shocks of wheat, and
And I was a shock of wheat too and in my dream all of your shocks bowed down to my shock.
And they said, that's rather shocking.
They were disturbed about it.
But Joseph was not too upset about it.
He went about his business and confronted them on the following day and he says, fellas,
you remember I was telling you about my dream the other night?
Well, I've had another one and this one was in technicolor.
This was a great dream.
He says, in this dream, all of us were stars in the sky. And dad and mom were there, too.
Dad was the sun and mom was the moon. And my star was so bright that it outshone all
the other stars and the sun and the moon. And in my dream, the sun and the moon and
all the stars bowed down to my star. And they said, oh, brother. And they got a gunny sack
and put it over his head and said, where do we hide the body? And while they were debating
," and they decided they really ought not to kill him because dad would never forgive
them.
And just at the nick of time in true Hollywood style, what should happen?
But over the nearest hill came a caravan heading into the big city, and their commercial instincts
took hold, and they said, we can't sell him if he's dead.
So they tied Joseph up and put a gag in his mouth so he couldn't complain and they hailed
the chief of the caravan and they said, we've got a runaway slave here, how much can we
get for him?
Well the price is recorded, they got 20 pieces of silver which is a pretty good price for
a runaway slave.
Anyway Joseph was tossed up into the pannier of a camel and the fellows went back to tell
dad a cock and bull story that they'd invented in the meantime of how they'd disposed of
the body.
Anyway, as we say in Hollywood, the camera follows Joseph. He must have had a whale of
a ride. Anyway, it was going down into Egypt and it arrived at an oasis. This was where
there was a fellow that had a ranch. An oasis is just a ranch with a well. That's what
this was. There was a ranch with a well that we call an oasis if you live over there. This
Camel caravan came up and stopped to water the camels, and the man who owned the ranch
came out to get the latest news.
You see, this is before the days of the Los Angeles Times and the Santa Ana Register and
things like that, and the only way you could get any information was by word of mouth.
So this caravan had pulled up, and the man who owned the ranch came out.
His name is Potiphar.
And so he started talking to the captain of the caravan, getting the latest information,
and he noticed that one of the panniers on the camel kept sort of jumping every now and
again.
And so he finally said, what have you got in there, you know?
Well, the fellow running the caravan was a little nervous about Joseph anyway because
he didn't really have a verified bill of sale, you know.
So he said, well, I've got a runaway slave, and if you're interested, I could sell him
cheap.
And Potiphar said, well, it just happens I could use another house servant, so if the
price isn't too high, why, we've got a deal.
This price is not recorded.
I don't know what the sale is.
I can only say I hope the caravan made a little profit here.
But anyway, Joseph was sold to Potiphar, and then the caravan went on about its business.
And of course, poor Joseph just stood there, his hands were tied and the gag in his mouth.
And after the dust from the caravan settled, Potiphar turned around and took out the gag
and untied him, whereupon Joseph executed a little bow and said, Mr. Potiphar, sir,
this is your lucky day.
And Potiphar said, it is what makes it so lucky.
He says, well, you've just met me.
And he says, of course, I know, I look like an ordinary guy, but actually I'm a genius.
As a matter of fact, he said, I really have a pipeline.
It isn't me, but I have friends upstairs. And if you are nice to me, everything is going
to work out. Well, Potiphar said, oh, is that so? So he said, let's put you to work and
see what you can do. Well, it happened. Joseph had been raised on a ranch and he understood
farm work. And from the time Joseph got on that ranch, it prospered. The crops came in
well. The increase in the flocks occurred. Everything was really flourishing. And Joseph
Joseph was an ambitious young fellow and worked his way into the confidence of Potiphar and
before long he was the head wrangler managing the affairs of the ranch.
Well then one day there was a little problem that came up and Potiphar had to go into town.
Now Potiphar you have to understand is a man of parts.
He not only had this ranch which he operated but in addition he was a captain of the Pharaoh's
guard and then on top of that he also ran the jail.
I mean this fellow, you know, had his hand in both sides of the fence.
So he had to go in on the pharaoh's business and he left Joseph in charge of the ranch.
And what happened, we're not quite certain, you see, we get conflicting reports here,
but apparently Joseph had to go into the house to look at last year's grape records and
as he was walking down the corridor, why Mrs. Potiphar accosted him.
Now, well, that's one of the stories at least.
We're not sure who accosted whom, as a matter of fact.
But the upshot of it was that through some kind of a confrontation that occurred between
her and Joseph, he left his cloak in her possession and skedaddled out of the building.
So when Potiphar got home that night, you know, and started to walk over to the house
to go in to get supper, why Mrs. Potiphar came running out of the house crying and she
said, oh husband, mine, what a terrible thing you've done to leave this whole property
in the charge of this miscreant, Joseph, why he accosted me and he made absolutely improper
suggestions to me, but fortunately I screamed and scared him away, but I grabbed his cloak
and see I have it here.
Well, of course, Joseph was standing there, you know, twisting his hat, first on one foot
and then another, and finally he says, honest boss, you know, that's not quite the way
it was.
He said, now, I was innocently going in the house, I had to get these records, and she
grabbed me.
I'm ticklish.
I had to get away and I did, but I didn't say anything out of place or anything like that.
Well, Potiphar listened and weighed the evidence, what there was. Most of the evidence was just a cloak.
And he finally decided, rightly or wrongly, we don't know, and he took Joseph by the scruff of
the neck and took him over to the dungeon, which he was in charge of too, and threw him in.
Whereupon Joseph, who was never at a loss under situations of this type, turned around and said,
Joseph said, if I've got to be here in this crummy jail, how about making me a trustee?
You know I'm a good organizer.
I'll get this thing running at a profit, if you'll give me a chance.
So Potiphar said, okay, you can be the head man on the inside, I'll be the head man outside.
Just as long as you stay in, you can run it.
And so Joseph did this, he took over, and you know he had that jail whipped around in
good shape in very short time.
Now there's another part of this story that comes in, the Pharaoh at this time, he gets
into the act.
He's a very interesting man, this Pharaoh.
He's something of a gourmand, you know, loved rich food.
And he had a delicate stomach, he couldn't really handle it too well.
So one night he apparently had an attack of indigestion, and he figured he'd been poisoned.
Well now, he knew he had it coming, but anyway, he went over in his mind who could have done
this to him, and there were only two people that had access to the food before it was
served.
One was the butler that actually served it, and the other was the baker that it cooked
," and he went to the cell and said, What in the Sam Hill is the matter with you guys?
What are you crying about? And they said, Well, Joseph, we've had a dream. Well, now
that could get you. I mean, here's two guys and they had one dream, but this is before
Freud and you could do that. Anyway, they'd had this dream and Joseph said, Well, he said,
If I know what you need is an interpreter, but human beings can't interpret dreams.
But fortunately I do have connections and if you want to tell me what the dream is, I'll
see if I can get a message down.
So they told him their dream.
There were slight variations, but fundamentally it's the same story.
And Joseph listened to it and he said, yeah, I'm getting a signal, hotline's open.
Here it is.
What your dream signifies is that within three days the Pharaoh is going to have a birthday party and at that time you both are going to be taken out of the jail and you're going to be adjudged and one of you is going to be returned to favor and the other is going to be hanged.
You know, they both thanked him, which sort of creates the impression in my mind that maybe they both thought they were innocent.
The chances are pretty good that they were.
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But if you thought you were wrong, well then you were put to death and there were a number
of ingenious ways of doing it, colorful, you know, to amuse the crowd.
So anyway, this was a big gala for the birthday and the two fellows were taken out and the
butler was restored to favor and the baker was hanged.
Well, the butler came back to the jail to pick up his shaving kit and other things and
He ran into Joseph, and Joseph said it worked out, huh?
And he said, yes, boy, you're great.
You're the best dream interpreter I ever ran into.
And Joseph said, well, keep it in mind, he says, you know, I know I'm head man in the
jail, but, you know, I've got bigger ambitions than this, so put in a good word for me when
you get up in the palace.
And the butler promised to do this, but he completely forgot it, and he went up to his
resort to favor, and two years went by with Joseph still there in the jail.
And then this, the Pharaoh had another problem. Again, he'd overeat and this time he had,
he had a real dream. And as a matter of fact, he woke up screaming. And the dream that he'd
had, it's one of the most famous dreams in all literature. I'm sure you remember it.
It's the one where the seven cows come up out of the river and they move into the field
and they start devouring the corn. And then seven lean cows come out and they devour the
The Fat Cows, and it's a big thing, and that's what scared the Pharaoh, because cows are
vegetarians.
So anyway, he woke up in the middle of the night screaming, and he called for his soothsayers
and necromancers and economists, anybody, it was not particular.
He asked him to come in and interpret his dream.
Well they came in and they started trying to interpret it, and the more they told him
about it, the less he understood, and he was getting a good hit of steam on and getting
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Perfumed, took a shower, put on clean clothes. I mean, this is his court appearance and he's
going to make an impression. So he got himself ready. And when he was ready, and of course
the Pharaoh was stewing, you know, and got pains all the time, so finally Joseph put
in an appearance and bowed very graciously and said, O Lord of the North and South, ruler
of the two lands, what may thy most humble servant do? And the Pharaoh said, I've had
Joseph said, well, as a matter of fact, he said, only the divine can interpret dreams.
Fortunately, I'm here. If you'll just tell me what the dream is, I'll see if I can get an interpretation.
And the Pharaoh told him the dream, and Joseph said, well, actually, it's fundamentally simple.
You see, the seven rich cows, the seven fat cows, that indicates seven years of plenty that are coming to the land of Egypt.
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Walter, I never heard of anybody like that. What does he do? Well, you give him economic
control of all the food. That's what he does. And you see, what you have to do, you
have to get a picture. You see, in the lean years, you get kind of a trough. It's a
depression. There isn't enough to go around. But remember, you've got some good years
ahead of it. Now, that's a convex. See, this is concave, the other is convex. So when
When you have the surpluses, you take them away and you store them for the bad times that
are coming, and then you have the ever-normal granaries, it just goes across even.
You don't have too much to begin with, you don't have too little later.
And he said, so get yourself a secretary of agriculture, and he started to bow out again.
The Pharaoh said, now wait just a minute, you don't leave till I tell you to.
I never heard of this job before, but that's a pretty good idea.
What are you doing right now?
Joseph said, well, as a matter of fact, I'm not too busy.
And the Ferris said, okay, how would you like to be my secretary of agriculture?
Joseph said, what's in it for me?
Well, what's in it?
He says, I'll tell you what's in it.
You get to be the number two man in the kingdom.
After me, you come first.
And he says, I'll give you, I'll even build a new building for you.
You get a whole bureau with all the bureaucrats and secretaries and I'll get you a new chariot
and people to run in front and throw out flowers and say, gangway, gangway for the Lord High
Secretary of Agriculture.
Joseph said, I'll take it.
The Pharaoh actually handed him a ring and said, wear this and anytime you flash that
ring, the rest of you people keep that in mind when you see that ring, jump because
Joseph took over and what did he do? He imposed a tax on the people of Egypt, a tax to be paid in produce, not in money, because the people didn't have the money. So he taxed them one-fifth of all they produced.
but times were good and the people could pay it so they got their drays and their camels and their carts and they dragged it in to the central city and Joseph had his bookkeepers come out and they checked it off and gave everybody a tax receipt you know and then they started storing it and this went on for seven years the crops were plentiful the times were good the people didn't complain because they had enough and they could pay their taxes too so all went well for seven years and then the dark days came
It came. Whether the dark days were precipitated in part by the tax, I don't know. But it
came. It is said, in fact an inscription appears in one of the pyramids on this point, that
there was a year when the Nile failed to overflow. And in Egypt that Nile is the thing on which
farm life, in fact virtually all life, depends. And without the Nile overflow there was no
No Crop, and famine descended upon the land even as Joseph had predicted. So the land
turned dry and great cracks ran through it, and the birds fell down and died and nothing
grew, and at the end of the growing season there was no harvest, and the farmers were
now poor and the people had nothing. So they got together and they came into the central
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he's in charge of famines so if you just go over there and make your appeal to him everything will
be all right so they got up and dusted themselves off and they paraded around the secretary of
agricultural building and then they prostrated themselves there and they said oh great secretary
of agriculture thy people starve and Joseph came out on the top step he didn't have a balcony
and he said have you got any complaints and they said no we're just hungry well he said uh that's
It's odd.
He said, I thought you produced the food.
They said, we did, but we didn't get any this year.
He says, well, I've got grain.
They said, yeah, we remember.
He says, well, I could let you have some grain.
And they said, well, that's wonderful.
He said, naturally, you people wouldn't want it handed to you.
He says, I'll sell it to you.
Well, they said, that's all right.
We've got our pride.
We'll buy it.
He said, fine, I'll sell it to you.
And he did. He sold them grain for their money. Now, the price isn't mentioned in the good
book, but if you take a look, you discover that he took all the money they had, because
the next phrase says, and the money failed. He got it all. But he gave them grain in exchange
for their money, and they were happy, because they got fed, and so they took their grain
back out, and everything was fine. But you see, the next year, there was no produce either.
And so this time, the people were really in dire straits, and they came back again, and
This time they didn't even fuss with the palace, they knew where the grain was, so they did
their demonstration and they went over there and said, oh great Joseph, thy people starve,
we're back.
And he said, I see that you are, and I still have grain.
And they said, yeah, we know, we saw the supplies, looks like a good supply.
He said, well, fine, I'll sell you some more.
And they said, sell, who's kidding who, you took all our money last time, we haven't got
any money.
Oh, he says, I'm not a hard man, you must have something.
And he said, well, all we've got is the tools of production, you know, the oxen and the carts and the tools, things like that.
He says, all right, I'll take that. So he did. He took their tools in exchange for grain.
But they were happy, what the heck they could eat. So they took their grain and they went back and another year went by.
And then they came back the next year realizing that they were now powerless to produce because they didn't have the tools.
And so they were really in even a worse condition than before.
and this time when they appealed and they went through this same little pantomime
why Joseph said okay I'll sell you some grain what do you give me for it and they
said now look you know you've gone far enough you have everything that isn't
nailed down he said well you've still got the land they said yes we do says
I'll take that so they deeded their property over to Joseph in exchange for
and the next year when they came back they had nothing in fact he had let them go back to live on his land and now when they came they were completely destitute and he said now my friends we solve the problem because from here on the government of Egypt is going to take over and you don't have any more worries you just sign in as a bonded slave of the Pharaoh and Joseph
And the minute you do that, your problems are taken care of.
Because from this time on, we'll let you go ahead back to your own places that used to be yours, they're now mine, and I'll lend you the tools.
And I'll provide the seed, whatever you need, and you can produce for Egypt.
And all we ask is that you turn over 20% of everything you make and you can keep the rest.
Now, nothing seemed to happen to Joseph.
The story goes on in the scriptures to tell us about how he brought his brothers in, and
they too came in to get food and so on.
But there's an interesting development that began to occur in another neighboring country
where there was another king that learned of what was going on in Egypt and he sent
spies in to find out about it.
And the spies came back and reported and they said to him, there is a man in Egypt whose
name is Joseph who is either the greatest genius who ever came down the cosmic pike
or he's psychoceramic. That's a crackpot. So the king said, how do you know which is
which? And they said, we can't tell. But this fellow has become a secretary of agriculture
and he has established an ever normal greenery. And it's either going to mean plenty and prosperity
for Egypt from here on or they're going to go broke. And the king said, let's wait and
and so with the passing of time Joseph lived out his life and the Pharaoh that he served lived out his and then a new Pharaoh came to the throne but as the new Pharaoh came to the throne the economy of Egypt collapsed permanently and when the neighboring country made this discovery then a great army was raised and it came across the Egyptian border sweeping all before it and at this time
Men ran into the Pharaoh, crying, O great Pharaoh, come and save thy people.
And the Pharaoh hitched up his chariots and he went out calling on the people to rise
to be his army, to defend their land.
And the people looked up from the places where they were laboring as serfs in the field,
and they had the expression of dumb driven cattle on their faces.
And they said, Who, me? I should volunteer for a war like this? It is a matter of supreme
indifference to us who is Pharaoh. We don't own anything. We don't own our own lives.
We don't own the land that we till. We don't own anything. Ownership has ceased to exist,
and with it our freedom. So go ahead and have your war, but I will not help you."
And so the invading army swept over Egypt like a scourge of locusts, and that particular
kingdom was overthrown. Now, as you realize, I've taken a few liberties with the script.
But I haven't taken any liberties with the story, because that's the story that you'll
will find if you take a good look at Genesis and read the story of Joseph.
And some of what I've told you, where it touches on historic events, is factual.
The invasion of the Hittites and the drying up of the Nile, those are true.
And for all I know, the whole thing may be true.
What is important to realize is this, that when people become dependent on the government,
When they ask the government to solve their problems in any area, government doesn't solve
problems.
And the conditions that may have been bad become worse, and in the end freedom is lost,
and people revert to slavery and oppression.